Relationships are hard work. They can be exasperating and amazing, all in the same day! Navigating the tight-rope balance between you, me, and us, the conflicts arising from our unique histories, and the conflicts arising from the external stress of life make for quite the challenge to the care and feeding of a long-term relationship. Life happens and how we each deal with life and each other happens.

This is why getting support and tools make so much sense! Miscommunications, misunderstandings, conflicts, distance, betrayals big and small are more readily resolved by taking quick, committed, effective action.

Here’s what you stand to gain by taking the leap and investing in your relationship and your personal growth by seeking couples counseling.

  1. Improved communication and listening skills– Learn ways to have more calm, clear, concise communication in ways that are not threatening. Also learn how to listen with empathy to move toward mutual understanding.
  2. Increased closeness, connection, intimacy–Share ways that each of you feels close and connected. Increase positive time together. Improve the quality of and quantity of physical affection. Learn ways to convey emotional attunement so that each of you feels seen, heard, and understood. Learn ways to build a more positive and appreciative relationship culture.
  3. Conflict resolution skills–Learn skills to effectively negotiate and problem solve the “solvable problems” rather than continue having the same circular argument that ends with hurt feelings and frustration rather than resolution.
  4. Repair, resolution, and healing from hurts, resentments, betrayals, mistrust–Have the hard conversations with a trained facilitator that can help you create avenues to healing and specific repair strategies.
  5. Insights and personal growth that comes from self and other exploration and understanding–Gain insights about your early learning about relationships that have subconsciously influenced how you show up in your relationship. With new insights comes intentional choice about changes you want to make that bring you closer to the relationship you want to have and partner you want to be. Also gain insights into your partner’s early relationship learning and your relationship “dance”. Deeply understanding each other leads to greater intimacy and greater ability to meet needs and solve problems.

Couples counseling is definitely an investment…of time and money. Couples counseling isn’t easy. Hard topics and difficult feelings will be discussed. You will be expected to look at your own contribution to the relationship challenges. These conversations can be uncomfortable, however, a more rewarding and positive long-term relationship might be well worth that investment. And, as I like to tell my clients, couples counseling is generally way cheaper than a divorce! Keep your relationship healthy and humming along with couples counseling.